What??

That's what I wanted to ask this woman at Costco today. She was doing a food table, but not the usual kind. Hers was bigger, set up on a little stand so the gathering crowd could see her, and she was talking to the crowd as she made her fruit smoothie. I'm not sure if she was selling the blender or the fruit smoothie mix, but I am sure that she was selling quackery. Yes, that's right. Quackery.

Several things I heard her say as I walked by:

• "This fruit is packed with chlorophyll, which will act like Pac Man inside of you. The chlorophyll will just eat up all the toxins in your body" (sidenote: the fruit she was putting in the blender wasn't green, so actually wasn't packed with chlorophyll. And I think she's talking about antioxidants in that last part, which aren't associated with chlorophyll, really.).
  
• "Sugar and corn syrup are killing our society" (Whoa! Does the FDA know about this?)
• "This drink will make you much more health-conscious. You will start reading books you never would have picked up, about health, and you will start eating healthier things. You will know more about nutrition than before you started drinking this drink." Um...did you just say that drink will make me smarter, and read more books? Get me some of that!

I wonder if her employer tells her to make sensationalized statements like that or if she is doing it on her own. Because the FDA would like to know about that.

A Lesson Learned

My hands are hot! I cut up some habanero peppers for the Jamaican jerk chicken we're having for dinner tonight. Jesse told me I should use latex gloves, but we didn't have any, and I didn't want to look like a sissy anyways.

At first the tops of my fingers started getting a little warm, but by that time I was done cutting the peppers, so I just washed my hands and moved on. Soon the rest of my hands started getting hot. I tried washing them again (and again and again), scrubbing them and soaking them with baking soda. By the time I went to bed, the whole tops of my hands were hot. I did put aloe on them, which helped. When I woke up at 4:30 (thanks, Ian), they were fine again.

When I woke up for the second time this morning I had a cookie that I had put in a sandwich bag last night (after making the jerk) and my lips got hot. I then realized what had happened and washed my hands, drying them on the same towel I had dried them on last night. Now my hands are hot again!

I hope this chicken is worth it. If it is, I'll post the recipe.

Bouncing Babies

First, I would like to congratulate our good friends, Ben and Telia, and Dave and Denise, on their beautiful babies. We are so happy for you.

And now for the bouncing...I know that babies typically like bouncing. For Ian though, it seems to be a serious problem, perhaps even a compulsive disorder. It is impossible to get him to sit still for even a moment in your lap -- he must be jumping in your lap. And I think that he has ruptured my spleen at least four times. Some friends from church lent us a doorway bouncer as their baby is too big for it now. And so that everyone that reads our blog can see (which, let's face it, is really just everytwo -- me and Haley), I have posted a short video of the wee bouncing man.

New Year's Resolution

I recently made another New Year's Resolution. You might think it a little late to be making resolutions all willy nilly, but I'm for change. (As a side note, I dislike it when someone asks Clinton or Obama about reforming government, and the reply is along the lines of "Look at us! I'm a woman, he's African American! Do you think we're for change?" Way to totally not answer the question.)

I have resolved to go running or walking every day, except for Sundays, and to also do push-ups and ab rolling. Things have been going fine, except for yesterday, when I did neither.

I've been doing this since last Thursday.

Remember When

This is another one of my favorite songs. It's by Alan Jackson. Sorry you are stuck with the subtitled/bootlegged version--the official version wouldn't let me embed it into my blog.



This song is kind of about Alan Jackson and his wife. Note the huge rock on Alan's wife's hand.

Happy Easter!

Easter always seems to sneak up on me. Maybe because the date changes every year, and sometimes it is in March, sometimes April. Because I didn't really realize Easter was around the corner, I didn't get a chance to do anything special for Jesse or Ian. Sorry guys! I'll make next year extra good.

Church was great. I am glad that we had the chance to talk about the atonement and the resurrection. The feeling I got out of our lessons was one of hope. I know if we live worthy lives, we can have the spirit to be with us always, and we will have the atonement's cleansing power. I am so grateful that Christ loves us so much that he paid for our sins.

The weather here is getting warmer, slowly. I miss Utah springs--after a hard winter, it is so nice to see everything blossom overnight, and to feel the warmth of summer coming. Here, the winters are not hard, and even though flowers are blooming, it's not the same kind of warm outside. I am still grateful that spring is on its way, though.

We hope everyone had a great Easter Sunday!

Would You Rather

Let's play the "Would You Rather" game.

Would you rather (if the next president was going to be a Democrat, which I think may happen) Clinton or Obama be the next president?

Haley Horrocks, RD

Wednesday I took (finally) and passed the Registration Exam for Dietetics.

Let's take a moment to examine how the exam differed from my expectations.

Expectations:

• The exam would ask questions that would contain relevant information I would use regularly as a practicing RD
• The exam would be on a computer
• The exam would be hard
• The exam would be secure
• I would be nervous to take it
• I might fail

Reality:

• The exam asked some questions that were pertinent, but also asked a lot that were not. If I had to practice as an RD with only the information I had studied for the exam, I would be useless.
• The exam was on a computer
• The exam was hard, in that the questions were very specific. They asked a lot of hard specific questions, and some easy specific questions.
  
• The exam was not really secure. They had cameras monitoring us, and they had us locked in a room, but the test company said the name and address you register with had to match your ID. Well, my name and address are both different than what I registered with, and they just told me to bring my marriage license (to verify the name change) and that the address didn't really matter. Well, it turns out the last name doesn't matter either--the girl told me she didn't need to see it. So, you can take a test with a different last name and a different address than what you registered with--doesn't seem very secure. What if I had my friend with the same first name take my test for me? She wouldn't need to even look like me, because she would bring in her own license. Does that make sense?
  
• I wasn't nervous to take it. I got to the testing area an hour earlier than I needed to and the test people weren't even there yet. I made some phone calls and hung out, and by the time they got there, I just wanted to get it over with.
• I did think several times during the test that I was failing it. At the end of the test, the screen just goes blank, and then you have to take a survey. It wasn't clear if I passed or failed even then. After I took the survey I saw that I had passed. So, there were a good two or three minutes where I thought I might have failed.

I am glad it's over. But I do have to say one thing: The path to becoming a dietitian is filled with a lot of jumping through hoops. I hate jumping though hoops. I love nutrition, but if I had known how pointless half of the things we do are, I may have chosen a different major. Like interior design, or accounting.

Roley and Poley

Some people recently have criticized Ian saying that he is undernourished. For those that would criticize (Kathy), I ask you: Is this the physique of an undernourished baby?


Is this the face of an undernourished baby?


Malnourished, maybe, but not undernourished.

Ian= Calvin's Twin

We know this couple who's little boy, Calvin, wakes up around 4 am, sometimes later, sometimes earlier. Jesse and I would read their blog and see the times Calvin was waking up and just laugh at how crazy it was that this little 5 year old would be ready to start the day that early. It's really ironic they chose to name their son Calvin, because there are a lot of Calvin and Hobbes comics where Calvin wakes up really early and does something crazy

Well, for the last few days (mornings, really) Ian has been waking up around three or four a.m. ready to get up. I bring him into bed with me, thinking he'll calm down when he's around sleepy people, but he crawls all over me, pulls himself up on the headboard, explores Jesse's ears...when I put him in his crib with some toys he just starts crying. He does eventually go back to sleep about an hour later, but when he finally wakes back up around seven or eight he looks terrible--his eyes are all puffy and he still looks really tired.

I really really hope this is just a phase.

I wonder how often I will be saying that in the coming years.

One For Six

Yesterday was St. Patrick's day. I didn't realize it until around 8 o'clock last night. What I didn't realize until this morning was that it was also Jaymee's birthday. That makes my record 1 for 6 so far this year. What has happened to me?

Smithsonian Goals

Jesse's brother Jaron came to visit us for a few days. On Wednesday we got a chance to go into DC and visit some of the museums. We visited the Smithsonian Castle, where we saw some Asian art. Then we went to the Hirshhorn museum and saw some modern art. They had a lot of different stuff than when I was there the last time with Kathy. Still a lot of ridiculous things, but it's interesting. Here's a hot tip: don't take their elevators. They are really slow. Use the extra calories and take the escalator.

After that, we went to the National Portrait Museum. It's always a pleasant surprise for me when I go into that one. I expect it to be really boring, but then when I get there I really get into it. They have historically important paintings and I really like reading about the history behind the subjects in the paintings. This time they had an exhibit on hip hop, with paintings of famous rappers and spray paint murals on either side of the hallway. It was pretty cool. You can see the online exhibition here. Here's a teaser (compliments of Jaron):


In four more weeks my friends Josh and Jodi along with my brother Joel will come out to visit. Hopefully I will be able to see some of the other things I want to see, like some of the monuments, Arlington National Cemetery, the Bureau of Engraving and Print (still haven't gotten over that disappointment, Kathy) and the National Museum of the American Indian. I've been waiting to see that last one for a long time. Some time before we move I also want to go to the zoo and the aquarium with Ian.

Here are some fun pictures the two Horrocks boys took:

Worrisome Heart

Check out this jazz singer. Her name is Melody Gardot. She has had an amazing life. You can read about her here.

Today I Realized Just How Short I Am

....All in all, a very productive day.

Should This Worry Me?

I started getting around to changing my name on my credit cards, and I am a little concerned. One company wanted me to give them all sorts of information, which was fine. It just means my credit card is safely guarded, right? The rest of them just had me do it over the phone. They didn't even ask me to give the last five digits of my social security number to verify that it was really me.

There is one other thing that worries me. Once, Kathy sent me a gift card. Through the U.S. Postal Service. It got stolen and used, presumably by the same organization. Now I have this idea that mail is not safe. If it looks like I have to send personal information in the mail, I try to do it any other way. Anything is better than the mail. If there is no other way, I am really apprehensive about it and go out of my way to make sure I drop the envelope off at the post office, instead of in our mailbox. I also make sure the envelope is tightly sealed, you can't see what is inside it, you can't tell what is inside it by looking at the envelope....

It's starting to become a compulsive disorder. I'm going to turn into one of those people who strongly subscribes to some far-fetched conspiracy theory. Except it will be a strong belief that the postal service is dishonest, instead of something that matters, like the fact that the lunar landing was staged.

Two Things

Do you see these teeth? Ian got both of these in within a day of each other. He was slightly cranky.


Now his top ones are almost in and he has been so so so cranky. We're talking over a month of crankiness. He has been cranky enough for a mouth of teeth, so they had better be worth it. They had better be the best-looking teeth ever, or maybe the biggest teeth ever, to justify his crankiness.

He also started crawling just when he turned seven months old. I am glad. He has been able to crawl for the last month, but he would just go forward a few paces and then drop down and go back to his worm crawl. I was starting to think something was wrong. I guess the cost: benefit ratio wasn't low enough yet.

I Am Not Lying...

Nor am I embellishing.

Mean things doctors have said to me:

• Between (x) and (y), you could join the circus!
• You look terrible.
• Your skin is fine. Let's talk about your face.

The last one is my favorite.

When I was writing this post, I was reminded of a Brian Regan skit, which you can watch below.

Famous Schmamous

Famous people I have helped:

• John Glenn, astronaut, at REI
• Steve Young, football star, at Kneader's Bakery
• LaVell Edwards, BYU football coach, at Kneader's Bakery
• Donny Osmond, singer, at Kneader's Bakery

I didn't know any of these people were famous at the time I was helping them. They were, however, all very nice.

Note: I am not sure what is going on with my links. You can click on all of the names if you want to know more.

I would have used a Wikipedia link for Donny Osmond, but I found his personal website. It was too good to pass up. Click the link.

Fahrenheit 61: The Degree At Which I Freeze To Death

That's not just a cool title (based on the book Fahrenheit 451: The Degree At Which Books Burn). It really is 61 degrees in here. It's so cold that I have been getting the urge to eat things...things like warm soup and cookie dough and fried foods.